Sunday, 9 February 2014

Riddle of life :Unseen future ahead

     Hello,hi..today,i managed to listen "hyorin,crazy of you" without any pain anymore.I still remembered him (nampun namja) but only as a trace of my life.I didn't feel anything anymore.Yet.....the problem is i don't feel anything anymore as if i am no longer interested in love.For the first time in 24 years,this person here....is no longer interested in love story,no longer tangled with fairytalic dream ,and no longer bounced into love.I know it is the most good thing to do is letting him go but letting him go...made me only look the other way but love.Short-armed wangja?for now....not feeling anything.As if i let go everything when i let go of him.it feel like living but not loving....a lil bit dull.But i like to believe everything happens for a reason,right?Right,god?Could i possibly love another soul like i loved him,god?could such a thing be possible?
      Now,my whole family instead of winter season ,we fall into sick season.Starting from me,everyone is abviously infected.it have been a week or so.I am getting worry that mom's condition is getting worse.It is like it will never ended.Luckily,"lil goddess" only catch a light flu.Every night, before i went to sleep ,i check her forehead,making sure that she's not infected....that one night ,my mom said to me, "don't worry,your daughter is okay",as her own mom ,demonic diamond never do such a thing.Why?We didn't know either.even if "lil goddess" badly sick,she still....and will with her "old geezer" at the RIGHT TIME,11.00pm.normally,mom would stay up taking care of her children.To be truth,in any occasion or anything,SHE NEVER DO IT even when "lil goddess" is a baby up till now.She lied to her cholic that she stayed at night,but she just made us laugh.She even request my mom to lie for her.And eversince "lil goddess" start her elementary school,she never iron nor touch her daughter's uniform.Eventhough i was so sick (with fever ,cough,and bad flu that i can barely wake up from the bed)...guesss who does the ironing ?MEE...the sick me.My mom once said to us about demonic diamond,"She might be a smart brain at school ,but totally a fool ones when it comes to evverrything else."Just tonight, "lil goddess" , demonic diamond  (since she is waiting for sleeping time at 10 pm) and the rest are just sitting at living room,while i cooked.As demonic diamond reminded "lil goddess" about sleeping time ,"lil goddess" keep on moving from living room and kitchen ...back and forth.till a few minutes before her sleeping time,she stood in front of me,saying, "achik,when will you feed me my medicine?:"ohh...actually she waited for me to give her medicine.Asking who?ME~~~when her real mother is just sitting in the living room,doing nothing.She prefer waiting because she know asking her real mom is like asking for a yell.What should i do to this lil ones?
        Oh.about my work,lately i have been lucky.That is why i like working with rich people for rich kids.Before i try to buy nearly-hundred-ringgit school sweater but it turned out that i get it for free.This week,our supllier give cloth this time which then handed over to ME..~~~happy~~happy~~ (i wish to keep for eid..hehehehe)...that is the second 4-ela cloth i get for free.Last month,my co-worker spend it on me.hmm...i think there is more..but i forgot bout it.And wish not on talking bout food....hehehehe..it is free~free~~~with high overtime pay,i am HHHAAAPPPY working here although sometimes it is a lil bit bored.At least,with all this clothes,i managed to keep my style going on...working here,i am pampered well...like a dearess princess.well,i am a maknae though.
       The other day, i watched "superman return" when the choo Sunghoon put her daughter on his back before he swam slowly...So,she won't drown.It kinda reminded me of daddy.He used to do it when we are little.Nice memory...Missing you a lot ,dad.I wish you are here,dad.

p/s: Although sometimes,i am a lil off bit about my loveless feeling,but lately ,i am grateful.My old friend ...who have been married only a few day lost his wife to blood cancer.What can be worst than that?that happen only a few day after he happily invited our fellow member to his in-law side wedding ceremony.God....the only one pain i have know (and never WANTto experinced) the most worst is this.God,may he went through all this triumph with a strong heart.
it is truth that everyone have their own riddle of lifee.....one could never know what is ahead of them (happy or sadness).

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