LIVING THE HEART....sweetening bachelor with full hands of a mom

 Hi,hello.Today, "short armed namja" do something so sweet.So....sweet...sweet...I  was walking toward a car to take a few light bow of bread.So,somehow,we bumped into him.He who was suppose to just pass by,...returned and asking to help.My first thought,brrphh....yeah,that's what a man supposed to do.So?He is man..at least compred to dozen trillion man outside who just normally pass by and think ,"yeah,that's look heavy".It was like putting ENOUGH sugar to unsweetened tea.But then,with a box on his hand,he offered to to take mine,so thar he could carry more than us ,the woman.SSSSo Sweet....that...is what a gentleman would do.Now i understand by what,"cat lover" said by ,"gentleman could be realllly really charming ".That moment,he's charming though.Adding to that,he is not that type.My sis said, he is not that type that bother people aaatt alll.He even stay for a while to help me  with the customers before leaving after a while.Not only he dislike to socially mingled with people, he just like being hisself.But,eventhough it is hard to reach a conversation with him,but when we do,it is fun.For now,it is fun to chat....is it okay right for "moving on"girl?
   
        Today,my "lil goddess" is gone for a few hours to religious school.Mom is a lil bit worried but for since ,if she is safely arrive and in class, it is a done jobs.Worrying about making friends,is her survival and communication skill into the game.I used to have to do it.My lil sister used to have to do it.At first,it would be lousy and bitter experience of the owkwardness but it make you stronger.Didn't they?Today,i played mom hard or starting yesterday?or for so long?Ever since she started her school,i have been tasting the steam of iron for her school uniforms every night,picking her from school with my mom,feeding her food, dress her for religious school,make sure she properly entered her class and wait for a few while (just today's schedule ONLY)...Yaa!!!!tha nega thal ya?nega!!!nega???the funny thing is,usually in movie,there is bunch of moms lining up on bench in ballet class,gossiping or whatever ...waiting for her daughter...i've DONE IT.What a mom's tasks that i haven't done it yet? One and only,giving birth.Poo Poo?done.Put her into sleep? Always.the sound of "MY SLEEPING ORDER" and a GOOD NIGHT KISSES is the one of few things  she will do before sleeping..With who?Me.Punishment?i even have my won rules on her and she obeys it well.Mom asked a few times, "since when we've "raising a kid" in our life list?What an old ajhumma like mom and young bachelor like me do to end up REALLY REALLY  raise a kid? A love ofr my " lil goddess" is one reason to do ,but another is because of her.She is growing old to raise another child.And yet another is coming.I didn't know what will happen in future but for now,my decision is "i wash my hand".I have involved myself to much with my "lil goddess" ...too much that when she is in "real tear" or " injustice",it make my heart aches.Not looking her face ,making me anxious,if something bad would happened ...hmmm...that is too much of emotional value to be taken into consideration than works for non-biological "thal"  i have or mom.though it is tiring sometimes,i am glad we have one another ( mom and i) in hand...yet our wise and smart "lil goddess"
      I'm still in moving in mode.I can't write much as i am trying to avoid on remembering.The effort is still going on.
     As i am living life now, a girl is brutally raped and the case is going under the hidden blanket for the sake of school and everyone.What kind of BEASTLY ANIMAL that could ruined life of 14-years girl?Just living 14 short years,her future is supposed to be far more beautifully designed ahead and some ANIMAL come and easy molesting her life? to that beast, i  hope you die slowly ..drop by drop...die of bleeding..yaaaaaA!!!!!!!intead,they put the rumour of her  suiciding...BULLSHIT!!She is raped.waking up of that,she should face "suicide accusation" and keep herself and mouth tight inside about her tragedy.Survive!! Don't listen to others as they  didn't face the same path.Be strong,girl!!!
     Just few minute ago,my mom just asked me to ask me to just snatched "nampun namja" away...more to seduce him.I didn't like the idea of seducing a guy that way.Marriage should start with a beautiful love.At least,i want it that way.I didn't like the idea of guy looking for my thigh instead looking into my eyes.I want a marriage till the death do us apart.Beside,i am not  fairy goddess...like my lil sister,my heart is not  emotion machine that could go on and off with a button.Please...chaebal..omma,your "force" might ruin every feelings and memory that could blossom. or not.Nothing is go on unless it is fated even you play the game the hardest way.